A moment of weakness

 In a moment of weakness everything seems clear, at least the emotion behind it does,  but then again,  in a moment of weakness a persons true self is revealed and that is what we all fear the most. That in these moments,  before our death;  in times of complete loss and madness and rage; we reveal our hearts true intention; and that which we find:hidden behind these doors is a window into our soul,  but the soul we ni longer know.

Perhaps that is why we find reasons to lie; to hide what we fear we really are inside.  However what if we already know?  If we have already fallen witness to the tyranny and destruction of our true selves. Would that be even more reason to to hide? Too afraid to show the world who,  or rather what,  we truly are...

If this is so, how can we be so selfish as to hide monsters in cotton cages and tame them with time? Is it all in an effort to tame the living beast, and wwith this same notion of time, break its spirit and conceal it within ourselves because that would be foolish of us all.

If however,  all of this may be so, then we are correct to fear these few,  brief moments of weakness,  for they are the ones that will be truly shatter us and reveal the souls that we really are without the masquerade and crumbling walls built to keep us safe, but when these are all to melt away,  I can only hope the ones around us can prepare for the aftermath we will unleash on the enemies of these very soul's,  our tortured souls...

xxxx
Mystique.

To Change

A dream will always be a dream if you dont do anything about it! A mistake will always be a mistake if you dont change it.

Its okay to be affraid of change, I know I am. I was holding on so desperately to the past. All that it had to remind me. the anger and pain and the what if's and things I'd wished I'd done and I just didnt want it to be so. I took a look back into my past one last time and I found Nine year old me deciding she wanted to be a writter. To apture the thousand words that could create a picture so clear, to create a world of her own between the lines, I wanted to pour my hear out for the world to see and perhapse touch a few lives...

I wanted to create something Great! Something like The Outsiders or Wuthering Heights, something that would last threw the years and over time, never fade. I wanted to create poetry in words and move people to tears...

However what i realized in that moment, what nine year old me wanted was exactly what eighteen year old me was affraid to have, to change everything around you and begin all over again is not as simple as we use to think it was when we were in high school, but then again, I was no longer in High School and in order for me to become the person i had for so long yearned to be. I would have to move the mountains within me.

I would change myself as i changed the world and created Greatness...
or atleast that was the plan as I packed a suitcase and began a little journey to my future. the journey to change...

To Change. xxxx
Mystique

For Dante.

A great friend who helped me realize a few things about myself and how strong i actually was made me think of something he liked to call powerful so this one is for you. 

"And she held her heart to the universe and urged the Gods to grant her flight. There was no doubt in her soul for she trusted completely and regret was fear for this..." 

For Dante xxxx

Mystique 

The welcoming comittee

Greetings and Salutations Strangers.

Welcome one and all to my little corner of the world wide web. Unfortunately there will be no grand parades or bands playing happy songs to welcome you here, apparently I'm not that awesome ( i know right, very hard to believe) however, what i lack in big bang and flash, I'll make up in heart. this blog probably wont be something famous or popular but its okay cause its not really set out to be, its just a little window into the life of a girl who's trying to survive in the world out there and maybe even live a few dreams here and there, so stick around, maybe you'll find you have a few things in common. you never know where the journey of life will take you.

Stay extraordinary  xxxx
Mystique.